Twas the Night Before Conkles Came

T’was the night ‘fore the Conkles would come to our house,
And Ruthie was fretting, like a dutiful spouse.

The place looked nicer than I’d ever seen
In the pretense that our home was always this clean.

The cats were all noisily busy at play,
In the smugness that Becky resented their stay.

And Ruthie was falling asleep, with a cough,
As I begged her to please turn her reading lamp off.

When in the other room we heard the phone ring,
And I wondered where Ruthie had NOW left that thing.

When out to the kitchen I made a quick dash,
And found she had knocked our lone phone in the trash.

The voice that I heard on the answering machine
Made us both doubly glad the apartment was clean.

When what to my wondering ears did I hear,
But my wife’s long-lost parents were finally here.


What a wonderful couple, so vibrant and young,
In excitement I found myself clicking my tongue.

As they pulled in the drive, and got out of their van,
We were glad they had upgraded from a sedan.


So into our home these two travelers flew,
My mother-in-law and her dear husband, too.

And then in a second, our memory drove
In the fact we’d forgotten to clean off the stove.

As I told Ruthie it was okay to calm down,
Up the porch steps the two Conkles came with a bound.

They were dressed in the clothes they’d been wearing for days,
And were sorting their way through the lost baggage craze.

A full bag of gadgets, he had in his pack,
which was full of new razors he’d have to take back.

We went out to breakfast, a quite pleasant treat
And made sure not to slip on the slick, icy street.

A nice, tasty breakfast, so pleasant and brown,
They had barely begun as I wolfed mine all down.

He went straight to his phone, without touching a bite
And continued to work on the lost luggage plight.

He continued to talk ‘til his breakfast was cold,
And he asked them to heat it again, so we’re told.

But through the whole process, after all of the gabbing,
They would get pick it up en route to Brain and Abby’s.

And away they soon drove, like the down on a thistle,
As my mother-in-law shouted love to her FSIL.

And they told us with passion, both deeply excited,
“Enjoy your next flight, but don’t fly with United.”


With love, from Chris
Christmas, 2008

Christmas and New Years

Christmas was a blast with my parents visiting us and the cats taking turns playing Christmas Ornaments in the tree. I took a lot of fun photos. Even though my parents still haven't gotten their luggage we had a great time together. I had cooked a LOT of food but we didn't eat nearly as much as I had planned so I have a TON of leftovers! We're going to a New Years Eve party so I'll have to bring the white chocolate pepermint pie I made that no one ate and the eggnog, otherwise Chris and I'll be eating all that sugar by ourselves. I'm a big believer in sharing the calories:-) Chris was sucking up to my mother big time, as always! They have a mutual admiration fest that just makes me SICK!!!! He even wrote them a poem, the Night Before Conkles Came!!! Spare me!

Dad was on the phone with United,the entire visit trying to track down their luggage which got stuck in Chicago, it made it to Cedar Rapids on Saturday and was supposed to be flown to Des Moines that afternoon, but disapeared into thin air again. The 800 number they were given was for India which never once got anything right regarding the location of their luggage. The website they were given to track their luggage didn't show anything either. We sent them on their way Sunday afternoon and they arived at Brian and Abby's that night. I had made a No Whining sign for Brian which he immediately put up so he can point to it whenever my sister starts to whine. I made Abby a Love, Honor, and Negotiate sign because she loves to get her own way. We had a wonderful Christmas but I'm glad it's over. Now it's time to undecorate and get the house back to normal again. Since I have so much work to do I'd better go do it.
Ta ta for now,
Ruthie

I just joined facebook!

Check out my new facebook site!!! Rachel talked me into joining, but of course, I can't find her on it! I did find a TON of ICA peoples on there though! It's so cool to see and hear from old friends again that I haven't heard from in years, my own fault of course for loosing touch. All those old photos sure bring back memories!

I have to get my elephant planter fixed, I brought it in to save my asparagus fern from the winter, but the cats are doing a good job destroying it for me, yesterday I was on the phone with my mom-I LOVE Vonage! Anyway, I heard this really loud crash, here they'd knocked over two of my cookies sheets that were drying and sent my planter which was on the shelf above the sink, onto the counter, they knocked a hole in the poor elephant's side. They love to nibble at the asparagus, yesterday I caught Gizmo actually SITTING ON TOP of the plant itself!!! Like I said, I thought I was saving it from being killed by the frost, but aparently I only made it worse! CATS!

I'm watching NCIS from last night and Agent Gibs put the photo of the NCIS agent that was killed on the wall of the bar with the photos of the fallen in the line of duty peoples, I KNEW IT! I knew Gibs couldn't be that dumb! I knew he suspected Agent Lee!! As you can tell, I'm a passionate fan! :-) Chris hates watching the news with me because I'm always talking back to the TV, a Conkle woman trait I'm afraid, all my sisters and my mother and I, we're all very vocal and opnionated!!! My new favorite this season is the Mentalist, the main character looks really familiar but I don't remember where I've seen him before, oh well, it'll come to me! Well, I've avoided my to do list long enough! I'd better actually do something productive rather than just play on the computer all day.

Safety Issues

Remember my recent comments about safety? You might be amused by this.
Last night as we were laying down for the night, Ruthie reached over and pulled a pair of scissors from the bed and put them on her nightstand. She had been working on an embroidery project. Very comforting to find a sharp object in bed when I am settling in for the night.
Tonight when I got home, they were back, as well as another pair on my seat at the table. Of course I can't let her get by without a few comments, you know.
Do any of you have similar safety issues?

Chris

Haunted Houses and Scary Movies

Our neighbor puts out a deliciously creepy haunted house display in his yard each year which Chris loves to go look at. Since I'm not a huge fan of horror/scary movies, (he claims I got scared watching Finding Nemo which I claim was mostly for show since we were engaged at that point and I just wanted to cuddle, I mean the part with the sharks was a little scary, but once I learned they weren't going to eat them I was ok). I finally got up the nerve to watch Psycho with him the other day, it wasn't too bad, but I draw the line at his Steven King movies. Last year he induced me to watch Nosferatu, an old black and white silent movie about Dracula, I LOVED it! I died laughing it was so funny! My favorite part was when Nosferatu is coming after the girl with the hands up to his chest trying to look scary but just looking ridiculous, I love to pretend with Chris holding my hands up like claws and hissing at him! Anyway, we went down today to look at the neighbor's yard one last time before he starts taking it down this weekend, I got some cool pictures, maybe tonight I can get some more photos when it's all lit up. I'll put them in when I get them off the camera.

Anniversaries and Injuries

I am considering buying a football helmet for Ruthie to wear while working at home. In the past few weeks, I have seen her bash herself over and over again. We have seen in our marriage:
1. Ruthie sitting at the computer and getting a serious splinter in her foot.
2. Ruthie drop one of her painted boards just under her eye. Keep in mind many of these boards are used in buildings such as barns.
3 Ruthie hit herself in the face with a pan while drying dishes.

Of course, the occasional headbutt to me is not a concern, as she may be just trying to give me a kiss, but her safety is a concern to me.
We had a nice anniversary, although I don't know what it is with all the emphasis on our age. (Thanks especially to Matt and Brian for the Old Farts and AARP membership comments.)

We recieved a nice set of penguin stocking holders from my mother, to match the penguin stockings Ruthie is embroidering. I gave her a set of candle holders. She made a nice cake for me and a delicious diner.

I gave her her card which she appreciated, but then she confessed that she had forgotten to give me my cards and wasn't quite sure where she'd put them, I told her that was ok, she could save money and just give them to me next year. She didn't seem to appreciate the genious of my thrifty comment.

Well, that's my news for now,

Chris

P.S. She just head butted my ear as I finished this. Another attempt at a kiss.

Cakes and Anniversaries

Well, I'm still fighting the cold that lasted 5 days for Chris, I'm on my fourth week! Today is our fourth anniversary, for Chris' birthday in May I tried to make a Red Velvet cake for him, well, after three unsuccessful attempts, I gave up. Today I'm giving it another shot. I measured the cake pans with a tape measure and it said they were 9 inches wide, so I put in the cake batter, it filled them up rather full, but I didn't think anything of it until I started to smell something burning. Here the cake batter had leaked over and was burning on the bottom of the oven. Of course that's better than the first time I made the cake, that time I had forgotten to add in the eggs, the cake batter exploded all over the oven! I had to throw that one out and started over again, this time I forgot to add in the vinegar and baking soda combo and so the cake was flat and burned. By the third time I was almost out of ingredients and frustrated and the kitchen was a mess, so when that attempt didn't turn out, I gave in and made him a cake from a box! Next time I make this I'll have to try 3 cake pans instead of two. That is if I decide to make this very irritating cake again! Every time I make it something goes wrong, that and it takes 2 oz of red food coloring, I used every bottle I had in the house, I didn't know I had so much food coloring until today! Of course now I'll just have to replace all my red food coloring for the next time I make this stupid cake and for Christmas cookies of course. Chris said that to save money this year we should just not do a whole lot for our anniversary, so then after I already said I'd just make him a special meal for his present he asks me if I've seen the present he got me!!!!! So, that's why the cake. Well, the cake is done baking and I'm delicately trying to get it out of the pans without totally destroying it. The frosting required some "tweaking" The milk and the flour were supposed to cook until thickened, but apparently I didn't let it thicken enough so the frosting was runny so I went through my corn starch trying to thicken it up once I added it to the butter and sugar I had creamed. After adding a combo of flour and powdered sugar I finally got it thick enough. Now if only the cake will come out of the pans nicely....! Well, the frosting is runny, the cake is misshapen, but hey it tastes great, so we'll just call it modern art.
Chris came home last night with a present from his mother, he won't even let me peek until he come home from work today! It's killing me not to know! He loves to do this to me, last year he wrapped this HUGE package and left it up on top of the tv cabinet for weeks, tormenting me!

Colds and Vet visits

I caught a cold on Saturday, from Chris. Although being very thoughtful and concerned about me in most areas, he couldn't help making fun of the way I sounded all weekend. I kept telling him it wasn't nice to make fun of his sick wife, but he just couldn't seem to help himself! I just took Bogey to the vet this morning for his second set of shots. The vet thinks he's about six months old, judging by his teeth. He gave me some more worm meds for the little bugger too. I'm hoping it helps to improve the smell of the litter box whenever he uses it. It's his third round of worm meds, I'm hoping the old adage, third time's the charm, is true in this instance. Our neighbor is setting up his Halloween display in his yard again. Chris and I look forward to watching it evolve every year. This year seems to be a pirate theme. Lots of pirate skeletons with eye patches. How did Halloween get to be a national holiday in all but name anyway? I am practicing my Ebay bidding skills. I have about 30 minutes before an item that I want is going off. I am biding my time until the last second before placing my bid. I'm also trying to watch the shows I tried to record last night while we were at AWANAS, but ever since Princess knocked the living room VCR off the shelf it's been messed up. We haven't been able to get the tape in it out, I've been able to record some shows on it in the past, but last night aparently wasn't one of those nights. It started to record the first show I had programed and then quit. I'm hoping that it didn't mess up all my shows. I can still watch them online, but I can't fastforward those comercials. I'm hopeful, because I started recording on NBC, the TV was on CBS when I turned it on. Well aparently I lost and the machine won. Nothing on the tape from last night. We're planning on replacing the VCR and DVD with a combo player. I'm thinking of shoppping for them on Black Friday when they have all the great deals going on. Well I managed to miss bidding on my item because my computer was too slow registering the bid, urgh! I'll have to keep practicing.

Cats!

Princess is our naughty cat. If there's trouble to be found, she'll be in the middle of it. If I hear a crash from the other room, I know which cat's bound to be responsible for it. One of her favorite things to do is to find a drink left on a table and jump up next to it, she'll stick her paw in the liquid and lick it to see if she likes whatever it is, if she likes it she'll stick her face in it and drink it up, if she doesn't she'll knock it off the table! When she gets in a bratty mood she'll jump up on the dresser and knock off everything on it to clear off what she perceives as "her" spot. She HATES the vet. He's the nicest man and treats her so much better than she deserves, but she just turns into MONSTER CAT whenever she has to go get her shots. I don't even take her out of the carrier when we go, he just unzips one side a little ways and pokes her with the needle while she hisses and squawks like she's being killed! She's still pouting about Bogey's arrival, I took him to the vet the other day and when I brought him back she hissed at him as if to say, "I thought we finally got rid of you, what are you doing back here you little twerp?" She loves to climb up to impossible places. I have a wooden crate on top of the cupboard I use for my pantry and it goes up almost to the ceiling, well one day I looked up and lo and behold Princess had climbed up there, removed the impediment of the pitcher I had up there and made herself at home. She loves to climb into my sewing bag, and so I'll pick it up and her little head will poke out! She hardly weighs anything as most of her is made up of fur, she's the hairiest of our cats, but Gizmo is the one who sheds the most, when I run my hand over her fur I come away with a ton of hair!

Gizmo is my lazy cat. She weighs at least 10 pounds and is very short and compact which makes it painful when she climbs up on my lap. She loves to climb up on us when we're in bed and stand on us demanding to be petted at four in the morning! The rest of the time she's really laid back. She's very patient with Bogey who loves to jump on her and wrestle with her. She's the last to eat and I have to persuade her to eat treats, she's a little air headed sometimes. She lets the other two walk all over her. She loves to lay on things. If there's a shirt on the floor, she's laying on it. Both she and Princess have a bag fetish, if there's a bag that they can climb into they will.














Bogey is a stinker. Literally. Whenever he uses the litter box you can really tell! He's really growing fast. He loves to cuddle and purr. I call him Dracula because he loves to nuzzle my neck with his cold little wet nose. He's got no fear of either cat who could easily squish him like a bug! He's always jumping on them and wrestling them, he makes sure he gets to the food first and won't budge no matter how much he gets growled at. He's super active, always running around getting into stuff. He loves to be wherever I am, he'll crawl up in my lap or on my shoulder and just purr away.

For the Love of Coffee

I love coffee, I cannot live without coffee! From the scent of the coffee as I spoon it into the filter to the aroma that comes as it brews and then the first heavenly sip that begins the wake up process, I love coffee! I am a zombie until I finish that first cup. I have three coffee makers, one is a regular 10 cup coffee maker for when we have company, one is a double travel mug coffee maker, and of course my lovely espresso machine. I worked a few brief months as a barista at a coffee kiosk where I learned to love specialty coffee drinks. My husband, on the other hand, will drink coffee under duress only if it is so heavily milked and sugared that you can't taste the coffee! My entire family is addicted to coffee and I marry a non-coffee drinker! Not only that but he doesn't like hot drinks at all, whereas I love any kind of hot drink, tea, cocoa, coffee, espresso. Especially in these COLD Iowa winters! He gets his caffeine from pop. He likes to drink decafinated iced tea as his favorite beverage, ugh!

Married Life ...

I remember like it was yesterday. Yes, there really was a time that I thought that I would be the ideal husband. I saw with perfect clarity all of the mistakes that my married friends made and was certain that, should I ever find myself in that blessed state, I would not repeat them. Everything was crystal clear, and I couldn’t figure out what happened to those well-intentioned comrades-in-arms once they exchanged their singleness for a wedding ring.
Then I got married.
Suddenly, to my great surprise, I saw chinks in my own armor. My patience did indeed have limits. The initial “goo-goo” phase where I never really had opinions faded like the fog on a sunny summer morning. I found that I had opinions on where to eat, what to buy, and what to do for an evening of entertainment that did not all fade with a sweet smile or a touch on my shoulder. In fact, I truly was as imperfect and fallible as all of those husbands that I had looked down my nose at with such great piety. Perhaps I hadn’t had all of the answers after all.
Somewhere today is another deluded fellow like I once was. Some young man is out there with all the wisdom that total inexperience allows. Maybe our paths will cross, and he can pull me aside, intent on sharing his thoughts on the simplicity of marriage, begging for the opportunity to bestow upon me a trifle of enlightenment before life’s experience contaminates his perfect knowledge. If he should do so, I don’t think I have the heart to tell him what truths he will discover about himself should his wedding day arrive. The eagerness of youth is too precious to discourage.
However, there is hope for me yet. I do still have all the answers about raising children…

Who We Are

Chris and I have been married for almost 4 years. Our family consists of three cats, Princess, Gizmo, and Bogey. Chris told me when we first got married that he would never agree to us having a cat since he had so many bad cat experiences as a child ... Princess was a Valentines Day present our second year of marriage. Gizmo came along the next year and Bogey, our most recent addition, is another little stray kitten that has found a home with us. He has been with us for almost a month, his sisters are still getting used to his presence. Of course it doesn't help that he loves to jump and wrestle them.

Our favorite movie is "You've Got Mail" because that's how we met. My aunt was visiting his home church in Boone, Iowa in June of 2003 and gave him my e-mail address, he eventually wrote me a letter, I wrote back, we started corresponding and he came to Toccoa, Georgia, where I was living, to visit for Thanksgiving. I flew up to Iowa for Christmas to meet his family. As a measure of his devotion, Chris had never flown before he got on the plane to come meet me! We debated who was going to move where but since my family is scatter all over the globe, it was decided the best option was for me to move to Iowa (in the middle of a blizzard in JANUARY!) where his family is. He proposed in March of 2004 and we got married October 30th of that year in our small country church.

We are total opposites in many ways because I grew up as a missionary kid in Burkina Faso, West Africa, I was a world traveler at the age of two. He went as far as Minnesota to college, and toured a few states by bus with the college choir. His whole family for generations is all in this town. My whole family is scattered hither and yon. The closest relatives I have are my grandparents in ShellRock, Iowa, but even they haven't lived their entire lives there!

Chris is obsessive compulsive about just about everything, I'm laid back about just about everything-except when my mother or mother in law is coming, then I go crazy cleaning the house while he laughs at me. I had to teach him that it is NOT the end of the world if something nice gets dirty. You have to actually wear nice clothes sometimes and you can't enjoy wearing them if you're terrified to get anything on them the whole time. I am accident prone, I can acquire a splinter in my foot, sitting at the computer desk-the floor isn't sanded the best. He is extremely cautious and careful where I rush in where angels fear to tread. I let most things just roll off of me where he gets worried and uptight about if someone is getting offended or not. My family is always yelling, shouting, arguing, etc, at the top of our lungs, where his family is excruciatingly polite to each other for fear they offend each other! I grew up with three sisters and one brother whom we spoiled rotten. Chris has one brother and one sister. His family has stayed in this area all of his life, my family has been all over the world. I went to boarding school in Africa, he went to public school in small town Iowa. He's calm when I freak out, I'm calm when he freaks out. It works. He's good with the math part about finances, I'm good with the practical side of finances. He can't say no to anything I ask, I'm so used to hearing my mother's voice asking me if I'm sure I want to spend my money on that little frivolous thing that I have a hard time asking for things:-)

We are the same in some very important areas. Chris and I both love the Lord Jesus Christ with all our hearts and seek to serve Him as best we can. We both grew up in the Christian and Missionary Alliance. We attend Bethel Church in Boone, Iowa which is affiliated with them. We are Sunday school teachers for an adult Sunday school class which we both enjoy now, but were terrified about to begin with. Leadership is always a bit scary. I enjoy being an AWANA leader on Wednesday nights, while Chris attends a Bible Study. He is in charge of rounding up people for special music during the services, he only has to do this every six months or so, but I love to hear him gripe about it every time :-) He and I both love to sing, but he's more comfortable doing it in front of an audience. He's great at solos, I'm terrified of singing solos, ask me to give a speech, no problem, sing, no way, he's just the opposite, again! We both love to write, and talk about writing a book together. He enjoys teasing me and I can't help doing things to make him tease me. I just am very talented in that area. We both enjoy reading as well.

Reading is something that he's picked up more since we got married. My whole family loves to read and we do it all the time so when he married me he had to start reading more in self defense. He started with comic books and has graduated to sports books, Stephen King, and lately he's reading Tender Warrior by Stu Webber. Me, I'm a bookworm, I'm currently in the middle of Raymond Feist's Midkemia Series, I'm waiting for The King's Buccaneer to arrive from Paperback Swap, I'm also in the middle of Eric Flint's General Belisarius series, I'm waiting on an inter-library loan for the latest in the series, The Tide of Victory.

One of my biggest pet peeves is that the library will start a series and then they won't have the rest of it, or else they'll skip around in the series so you only have half the books and you have to find the rest of them somewhere else! Some of my favorite authors are Mercedes Lackey, Anne McCafrey, David Weber-I can't wait for the latest in his Honor series to come out!, Kasey Michaels, Andre Norton, Diana Palmer, Stephanie Laurens, Lillian Jackson Braun, Rita May Brown, Carole Nelson Douglas ... well I read just about everything so it's hard to pick just a few. Chris hates it when I buy books because I'm normally done with them in a day or two and then never read them again, or at least not very soon. I resell a lot of them on Amazon or trade them on Paperback Swap.

Well, that's it for now, I'll have Chris write more later.