I remember like it was yesterday. Yes, there really was a time that I thought that I would be the ideal husband. I saw with perfect clarity all of the mistakes that my married friends made and was certain that, should I ever find myself in that blessed state, I would not repeat them. Everything was crystal clear, and I couldn’t figure out what happened to those well-intentioned comrades-in-arms once they exchanged their singleness for a wedding ring.
Then I got married.
Suddenly, to my great surprise, I saw chinks in my own armor. My patience did indeed have limits. The initial “goo-goo” phase where I never really had opinions faded like the fog on a sunny summer morning. I found that I had opinions on where to eat, what to buy, and what to do for an evening of entertainment that did not all fade with a sweet smile or a touch on my shoulder. In fact, I truly was as imperfect and fallible as all of those husbands that I had looked down my nose at with such great piety. Perhaps I hadn’t had all of the answers after all.
Somewhere today is another deluded fellow like I once was. Some young man is out there with all the wisdom that total inexperience allows. Maybe our paths will cross, and he can pull me aside, intent on sharing his thoughts on the simplicity of marriage, begging for the opportunity to bestow upon me a trifle of enlightenment before life’s experience contaminates his perfect knowledge. If he should do so, I don’t think I have the heart to tell him what truths he will discover about himself should his wedding day arrive. The eagerness of youth is too precious to discourage.
However, there is hope for me yet. I do still have all the answers about raising children…
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Who We Are
Chris and I have been married for almost 4 years. Our family consists of three cats, Princess, Gizmo, and Bogey. Chris told me when we first got married that he would never agree to us having a cat since he had so many bad cat experiences as a child ... Princess was a Valentines Day present our second year of marriage. Gizmo came along the next year and Bogey, our most recent addition, is another little stray kitten that has found a home with us. He has been with us for almost a month, his sisters are still getting used to his presence. Of course it doesn't help that he loves to jump and wrestle them.
Our favorite movie is "You've Got Mail" because that's how we met. My aunt was visiting his home church in Boone, Iowa in June of 2003 and gave him my e-mail address, he eventually wrote me a letter, I wrote back, we started corresponding and he came to Toccoa, Georgia, where I was living, to visit for Thanksgiving. I flew up to Iowa for Christmas to meet his family. As a measure of his devotion, Chris had never flown before he got on the plane to come meet me! We debated who was going to move where but since my family is scatter all over the globe, it was decided the best option was for me to move to Iowa (in the middle of a blizzard in JANUARY!) where his family is. He proposed in March of 2004 and we got married October 30th of that year in our small country church.
We are total opposites in many ways because I grew up as a missionary kid in Burkina Faso, West Africa, I was a world traveler at the age of two. He went as far as Minnesota to college, and toured a few states by bus with the college choir. His whole family for generations is all in this town. My whole family is scattered hither and yon. The closest relatives I have are my grandparents in ShellRock, Iowa, but even they haven't lived their entire lives there!
Chris is obsessive compulsive about just about everything, I'm laid back about just about everything-except when my mother or mother in law is coming, then I go crazy cleaning the house while he laughs at me. I had to teach him that it is NOT the end of the world if something nice gets dirty. You have to actually wear nice clothes sometimes and you can't enjoy wearing them if you're terrified to get anything on them the whole time. I am accident prone, I can acquire a splinter in my foot, sitting at the computer desk-the floor isn't sanded the best. He is extremely cautious and careful where I rush in where angels fear to tread. I let most things just roll off of me where he gets worried and uptight about if someone is getting offended or not. My family is always yelling, shouting, arguing, etc, at the top of our lungs, where his family is excruciatingly polite to each other for fear they offend each other! I grew up with three sisters and one brother whom we spoiled rotten. Chris has one brother and one sister. His family has stayed in this area all of his life, my family has been all over the world. I went to boarding school in Africa, he went to public school in small town Iowa. He's calm when I freak out, I'm calm when he freaks out. It works. He's good with the math part about finances, I'm good with the practical side of finances. He can't say no to anything I ask, I'm so used to hearing my mother's voice asking me if I'm sure I want to spend my money on that little frivolous thing that I have a hard time asking for things:-)
We are the same in some very important areas. Chris and I both love the Lord Jesus Christ with all our hearts and seek to serve Him as best we can. We both grew up in the Christian and Missionary Alliance. We attend Bethel Church in Boone, Iowa which is affiliated with them. We are Sunday school teachers for an adult Sunday school class which we both enjoy now, but were terrified about to begin with. Leadership is always a bit scary. I enjoy being an AWANA leader on Wednesday nights, while Chris attends a Bible Study. He is in charge of rounding up people for special music during the services, he only has to do this every six months or so, but I love to hear him gripe about it every time :-) He and I both love to sing, but he's more comfortable doing it in front of an audience. He's great at solos, I'm terrified of singing solos, ask me to give a speech, no problem, sing, no way, he's just the opposite, again! We both love to write, and talk about writing a book together. He enjoys teasing me and I can't help doing things to make him tease me. I just am very talented in that area. We both enjoy reading as well.
Reading is something that he's picked up more since we got married. My whole family loves to read and we do it all the time so when he married me he had to start reading more in self defense. He started with comic books and has graduated to sports books, Stephen King, and lately he's reading Tender Warrior by Stu Webber. Me, I'm a bookworm, I'm currently in the middle of Raymond Feist's Midkemia Series, I'm waiting for The King's Buccaneer to arrive from Paperback Swap, I'm also in the middle of Eric Flint's General Belisarius series, I'm waiting on an inter-library loan for the latest in the series, The Tide of Victory.
One of my biggest pet peeves is that the library will start a series and then they won't have the rest of it, or else they'll skip around in the series so you only have half the books and you have to find the rest of them somewhere else! Some of my favorite authors are Mercedes Lackey, Anne McCafrey, David Weber-I can't wait for the latest in his Honor series to come out!, Kasey Michaels, Andre Norton, Diana Palmer, Stephanie Laurens, Lillian Jackson Braun, Rita May Brown, Carole Nelson Douglas ... well I read just about everything so it's hard to pick just a few. Chris hates it when I buy books because I'm normally done with them in a day or two and then never read them again, or at least not very soon. I resell a lot of them on Amazon or trade them on Paperback Swap.
Well, that's it for now, I'll have Chris write more later.
Our favorite movie is "You've Got Mail" because that's how we met. My aunt was visiting his home church in Boone, Iowa in June of 2003 and gave him my e-mail address, he eventually wrote me a letter, I wrote back, we started corresponding and he came to Toccoa, Georgia, where I was living, to visit for Thanksgiving. I flew up to Iowa for Christmas to meet his family. As a measure of his devotion, Chris had never flown before he got on the plane to come meet me! We debated who was going to move where but since my family is scatter all over the globe, it was decided the best option was for me to move to Iowa (in the middle of a blizzard in JANUARY!) where his family is. He proposed in March of 2004 and we got married October 30th of that year in our small country church.
We are total opposites in many ways because I grew up as a missionary kid in Burkina Faso, West Africa, I was a world traveler at the age of two. He went as far as Minnesota to college, and toured a few states by bus with the college choir. His whole family for generations is all in this town. My whole family is scattered hither and yon. The closest relatives I have are my grandparents in ShellRock, Iowa, but even they haven't lived their entire lives there!
Chris is obsessive compulsive about just about everything, I'm laid back about just about everything-except when my mother or mother in law is coming, then I go crazy cleaning the house while he laughs at me. I had to teach him that it is NOT the end of the world if something nice gets dirty. You have to actually wear nice clothes sometimes and you can't enjoy wearing them if you're terrified to get anything on them the whole time. I am accident prone, I can acquire a splinter in my foot, sitting at the computer desk-the floor isn't sanded the best. He is extremely cautious and careful where I rush in where angels fear to tread. I let most things just roll off of me where he gets worried and uptight about if someone is getting offended or not. My family is always yelling, shouting, arguing, etc, at the top of our lungs, where his family is excruciatingly polite to each other for fear they offend each other! I grew up with three sisters and one brother whom we spoiled rotten. Chris has one brother and one sister. His family has stayed in this area all of his life, my family has been all over the world. I went to boarding school in Africa, he went to public school in small town Iowa. He's calm when I freak out, I'm calm when he freaks out. It works. He's good with the math part about finances, I'm good with the practical side of finances. He can't say no to anything I ask, I'm so used to hearing my mother's voice asking me if I'm sure I want to spend my money on that little frivolous thing that I have a hard time asking for things:-)
We are the same in some very important areas. Chris and I both love the Lord Jesus Christ with all our hearts and seek to serve Him as best we can. We both grew up in the Christian and Missionary Alliance. We attend Bethel Church in Boone, Iowa which is affiliated with them. We are Sunday school teachers for an adult Sunday school class which we both enjoy now, but were terrified about to begin with. Leadership is always a bit scary. I enjoy being an AWANA leader on Wednesday nights, while Chris attends a Bible Study. He is in charge of rounding up people for special music during the services, he only has to do this every six months or so, but I love to hear him gripe about it every time :-) He and I both love to sing, but he's more comfortable doing it in front of an audience. He's great at solos, I'm terrified of singing solos, ask me to give a speech, no problem, sing, no way, he's just the opposite, again! We both love to write, and talk about writing a book together. He enjoys teasing me and I can't help doing things to make him tease me. I just am very talented in that area. We both enjoy reading as well.
Reading is something that he's picked up more since we got married. My whole family loves to read and we do it all the time so when he married me he had to start reading more in self defense. He started with comic books and has graduated to sports books, Stephen King, and lately he's reading Tender Warrior by Stu Webber. Me, I'm a bookworm, I'm currently in the middle of Raymond Feist's Midkemia Series, I'm waiting for The King's Buccaneer to arrive from Paperback Swap, I'm also in the middle of Eric Flint's General Belisarius series, I'm waiting on an inter-library loan for the latest in the series, The Tide of Victory.
One of my biggest pet peeves is that the library will start a series and then they won't have the rest of it, or else they'll skip around in the series so you only have half the books and you have to find the rest of them somewhere else! Some of my favorite authors are Mercedes Lackey, Anne McCafrey, David Weber-I can't wait for the latest in his Honor series to come out!, Kasey Michaels, Andre Norton, Diana Palmer, Stephanie Laurens, Lillian Jackson Braun, Rita May Brown, Carole Nelson Douglas ... well I read just about everything so it's hard to pick just a few. Chris hates it when I buy books because I'm normally done with them in a day or two and then never read them again, or at least not very soon. I resell a lot of them on Amazon or trade them on Paperback Swap.
Well, that's it for now, I'll have Chris write more later.
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